The Journey to Self-Acceptance: How Coaching Helps You Become Your Own Best Friend
Self-acceptance is a cornerstone of happiness and resilience, yet so many of us struggle to truly embrace ourselves. Coaching provides a powerful space to navigate this challenge, helping you uncover the thoughts that hold you back and the actions that can propel you forward.
In a recent session, a client that we’ll call Sarah, a compassionate and driven individual, transformed her mindset and found new confidence. This blog combines insights from that session with practical tools you can use, including The Model, a framework for thought work, and a reflective journal exercise to help you move closer to self-acceptance.
A new day brings opportunities for self-acceptance and growth.
Where the Journey Began: Feeling Stuck
Sarah came to the session carrying a lot of emotional weight. She was juggling personal and professional challenges, striving to feel confident in herself while navigating tricky dynamics at work and health uncertainties.
Her goals were clear:
To feel more confident and capable at work.
To handle triggers and challenges with calm and clarity.
To deepen her sense of self-worth and acceptance.
Reflective journaling can be a powerful tool for understanding and reframing your thoughts.
Coaching in Action: Insights and Shifts
Coaching isn’t about giving advice; it’s about helping you uncover the answers within yourself. During Sarah’s session, we used reflective questioning and The Model to explore her thoughts, emotions, and behaviours.
1. Unpacking Self-Acceptance
Sarah shared a beautiful moment of feeling accepted by her partner’s family, which brought her joy and connection. Through coaching, she realised that this sense of acceptance stemmed from her own self-acceptance. Self-acceptance starts within. When you accept yourself, you create space for others to do the same.
2. Reframing Triggers at Work
Sarah struggled with a challenging colleague whose actions felt untrustworthy. Initially, this created frustration and defensiveness. Through coaching, she shifted her perspective:
Old Thought: “I can’t trust her; she might throw me under the bus.”
New Thought: “She can do her; I’ve got me.”
This shift allowed Sarah to step out of reactivity and into empowerment, trusting herself to handle the situation calmly and confidently.
3. Separating Facts from Thoughts
Sarah practised separating facts from interpretations, a skill that transformed how she handled triggering situations. For example, an email that initially felt overwhelming became an opportunity to respond with clarity and professionalism after she paused to separate the facts from her emotions. This is a simple process and you can practice this too. When you feel overwhelmed, pause to ask: “What are the facts here? What’s my thought about it?”
4. Focusing on Positive Thoughts
Sarah highlighted how practising positive thoughts that she believed daily had significantly improved her relationships and overall happiness. She and her partner focused on gratitude and verbalised positive observations, which strengthened their connection and boosted her confidence.
Where the Journey Led: Confidence and Empowerment
By the end of the session, Sarah’s mindset had transformed:
Workplace Confidence: Sarah felt capable of handling challenges at work, trusting herself rather than being derailed by others’ behaviour.
Stronger Relationships: She recognised how her self-acceptance positively influenced her connections, from her partner to her children.
Positive Momentum: Sarah committed to focusing on actionable steps, like drinking more water for better health, and reinforcing empowering thoughts daily.
A defining moment came when Sarah embraced the thought:
“I’ve got me.”
This became a powerful anchor for her, a reminder that she could handle life’s challenges with grace and resilience.
Coaching creates a safe space to explore thoughts and unlock self-confidence.
Use The Model for Your Own Growth
The Model is a simple yet powerful tool to understand how your thoughts shape your feelings, actions, and results. Here’s how to use it:
Circumstance: Identify the neutral fact of a situation (e.g., “My colleague sent an email to me with words in it”).
Thought: Note one of the thoughts you have about it (e.g., “She doesn’t respect me”).
Feeling: Recognise the emotion that thought creates (e.g., “Angry”).
Action: Observe how that feeling drives your behaviour (e.g., “Avoided her and dwelled on it”).
Result: See the outcome of your actions (e.g., “I create more evidence that she doesn’t respect me, and I don’t respect her”).
Now, reframe the thought to something more helpful, that you believe. We’re looking for a thought that feels better:
New Thought: “I define my own value.”
Use this to create a new Model, noticing how your feelings, actions, and results shift.
Reflective Journal Exercise
Take 10–15 minutes to try this exercise:
Recall a recent challenging moment where you felt stuck or triggered.
Use The Model to examine the situation and write out your:
Circumstance
Thought
Feeling
Action
Result
Reframe your thought to one that feels better.
Create a new Model with this thought.
This process builds awareness and helps you intentionally choose thoughts that align with the person you want to become.
The Ripple Effect of Self-Acceptance
Sarah’s journey shows how coaching can spark profound changes that ripple through every area of life. Her confidence grew not because of external changes but because she learned to trust herself, reframe her thoughts, and focus on what she could control.
This ripple effect is available to you too. With consistent practice and support, you can transform your mindset and build the self-acceptance that unlocks a fulfilling life.
Ready to Transform Your Life?
If Sarah’s journey resonates with you, it’s time to start your own.
Download our “Guide to Using The Model to Become Your Own Best Friend” and take the first step towards a more confident, empowered you.